Once upon a time, this not-so-fairy tale began at a country club in — let’s just say — Somewhere, U.S.A. Two club members, who have very similar names and who were scheduled to play in the weekend Men’s Club Championship, called the golf pro shop for their tee times. Here’s the rest of the story:

• Each was given the other’s starting time.

• Each missed his own tee time.

• Each was disqualified from the competition.

Did each member feel disgruntled at his club? Absolutely.

Did each member breach the Rules of Golf? Absolutely.

Rule 6-3a reads: "The player must start at the time established by the Committee." And while the rule has evolved to allow the Committee — in "exceptional circumstances" — to waive the penalty of disqualification, the interpretation of "exceptional circumstances" generally involves life-and-death types of situations. It did not extend to the telephone mistake by a pro shop attendant.

John Morrissett, director of golf rules for the U.S. Golf Association, noted, "Very rarely does a player intend to breach a rule." But also he added the perspective: "Very rarely does a golfer intend to hit a ball out of bounds."

Morrissett’s observations came during a session of the PGA/USGA four-day rules workshop held earlier this year in Norcross, Georgia, near Atlanta. The workshop, designed to educate anyone who wants to learn the Rules, was one of 19 four-day sessions scheduled this year in the United States. Attendance at a Rules of Golf workshop is often the first step in getting involved as a tournament rules official, a USGA committee member, or a club level Rules Committee member. One workshop annually is set aside for individuals who have scored 85 or higher on the optional 100-question Rules test that serves as the finale of each workshop. (This exam is not for the faint of heart — the average grade for this group of participants was 76.64.)

The biggest lesson of the workshop? While only 34 in number, the Rules of Golf expand exponentially into a complex web of more than 1,000 interrelated and overlapping situations compiled in 507 pages of small type in the biennial tome — Decisions on The Rules of Golf — issued jointly by the USGA and the Royal & Ancient Golf Club of St. Andrews, Scotland.

Perhaps the greatest testimony to the complexity and the seemingly infinite nuances of the Rules came during the introductory session of the school when the 120 participants briefly introduced themselves and cited, for the record, the number of times they had attended the $250 workshop.

They all were golf junkies, to be sure, but also with varying interests, vocations, and avocations. There was a horse doctor, a vascular surgeon, an accountant, a golf retailer, two college golf coaches, one high school golf coach, seven members of the Alabama State Golf Association, several PGA apprentice members seeking continuing education credits, a former rules official for the Masters Tournament, a Nationwide Tour player, a past president of the Georgia Golf Association, club members interested in setting up better competitive events, and, of course, this journalist and a variety of other followers of the Rules. (Yes, always referred to with the deference of capitalization.) About 50 people were attending for the first or second time, with most returning for a multiple exposure to the intense learning environment. The prize for most times: 15.

Martha Kirouac, captain of the victorious U.S. team in the 2004 Curtis Cup Match in England, said she keeps coming back "because I always learn something new."

In fact, the revision of The Rules of Golf that became effective worldwide Jan. 1, 2004, represented the most comprehensive revision of the booklet in 20 years.

And whether they came for the joy of learning, a career-track requirement, to add to their officiating resumes, or to get an edge on playing opponents, it didn’t take long to realize that rules-crunching is a pastime for overachievers who thrive on information overload. They’re opinionated and they’re passionate. They volunteer an incredible amount of time to the game of golf, the only sport in which players call penalties upon themselves. And most, as volunteers, not only do not get paid for their officiating assignments, but they also pay their own expenses associated with attending an event. The expenses are deductible on tax returns as charitable contributions since the USGA and state golf associations are 501(c)(3) charities.

DETAILS … DETAILS …
"My daughter calls me a ‘rules geek,’" said Ron Hickman, a member of the PGA Rules Committee who shared teaching duties at the workshop with Morrissett. Hickman served as an official at the 2004 Ryder Cup Matches.

He noted the importance of the Rules to the game — from the country club level to the highest levels of competitive golf. He cited numerous examples of professional golfers using their knowledge of the Rules — or their lack thereof — to their advantage and disadvantage in competitive play.

For example, Tiger Woods displayed a good knowledge of the Rules when he asked an official in the final round of the 1999 Phoenix Open if a large boulder was considered a loose impediment. Woods’ tee shot had sailed wide left and had come to rest behind the 1,000-pound rock. When informed that it was a loose impediment, Woods recruited nine gallery members to roll away the boulder, paving Woods’ way to a 13th hole birdie. Following the tournament, ABC editorial adviser and longtime golf rules authority Frank Hannigan told a newspaper sportswriter that he had never seen anything like the situation before. Hannigan was quoted: "Just when you think, ‘Is it possible to come up with something new?’ there it is."

Paul Azinger did not fare as well when, during Saturday’s round of the 1991 Doral-Ryder Open, he moved several stones by trying to get his footing within a water hazard. According to Rule 13-4, a player cannot touch or move a loose impediment laying in or touching a hazard. Unaware of his breach, Azinger turned in his scorecard without recording two penalty strokes. He was subsequently disqualified from the competition when a Colorado club pro phoned the next day to tell PGA Tour officials of the rules infraction.

Another scorecard disqualification occurred when Craig Stadler did not record a two-stroke penalty in the 1987 Andy Williams Open at Torrey Pines Golf Course near San Diego. Stadler placed a towel on the ground to protect his light-colored pants from the muddy ground as he kneeled under a cypress tree to take his shot. Coming into play in this situation was Rule 13-3, which says that a player is "entitled to place his feet firmly in taking his stance, but he must not build a stance." Eight years later, however, Stadler got his revenge when a fungus infested the tree and course officials gave Stadler the pleasure of cutting it down with a chain saw.

THE RULES EXPLAINED
Perhaps only exceeding the numerous and various applications of the Rules are the varying opinions about the Rules. The Rules of Golf even have spawned a cottage industry, separate from the USGA and comprised of obviously brave-and-bold souls who offer up a variety of media that attempt to explain and simplify the Rules. There are hardback, paperback, large print (and otherwise), and fully illustrated books whose titles incorporate reassuring promises that their contents are "in plain English," "crystal clear," and "plain and simple." Of course, there is the requisite and familiar-yellow bound Golf Rules & Etiquette for Dummies. The aftermarket for the Rules includes videotapes, DVDs, software, Internet sites, wall hangings, bracelets, coffee mugs, and other specialty items.

Even the experts proffered editorial comments upon the ever-evolving domain of golf governance. For example, the PGA’s Hickman described Rule 12 (Searching for and Identifying Ball) as "a significant rule" and advised workshop attendees to note that "it starts general, gets specific." He pointed out that Rule 14-2 (Assistance) can be "a big problem on the club level" because simple exchanges during the course of playing a round can be judged to be providing "assistance." He assessed Rule 33 (The Committee), however, as a "great rule for those organizing competitions."

The USGA’s Morrissett commented that the Rule that brings the most calls to Golf House [USGA headquarters in New Jersey] is Rule 31-4 (Scoring). Problems arise with this Rule, regarding Four-Ball Stroke Play, when recorded scores are not individually identifiable. Penalty is disqualification. According to Morrissett, the "one rule everybody knows" is Rule 16-1.b (Lifting and Cleaning Ball). And he noted that the newly revised Rule 33-7 (Disqualification Penalty; Committee Discretion) created "a big deal in the media," but he did not know of a situation in which it was applied in its first year. This revision includes a provision that a player may be disqualified for a "serious breach of etiquette." Thus, golfers debate: What constitutes a serious breach of etiquette?

No doubt, the Rules of Golf provide great fodder for the 19th Hole and beyond. And lest you think that the world of golf is making a mountain out of an anthill, just read Rule 23-1. The rule decrees that an anthill is a loose impediment and may be removed. … And if the anthill is a fire ant mound, Rule 1-4 provides relief. … Or the Committee can declare the anthill to be ground under repair. …

Any questions, class?

FOR MORE INFORMATION
Visit www.rulesofgolf.com for frequently asked questions regarding the Rules. For a selection of U.S. Golf Association books, pamphlets, and videos, see www.usgapubs.com or call 800.755.0293.